Aunt Doris

11 Mar

Today is the anniversary of my Aunt Doris’s death at age 51. My Aunt acted like a second father to my sister and I. She was shorter than myself and had an extreme hunchback or kyphosis. Even though her health was compromised by this spinal defect, she was a dynamo of a person! I never wanted to see her mad, because she was an Aries and watch out, she would put anybody in their place! I always did what she told me to do. No questions asked. When I did stop a job she had given me, she would remind me, that I had to finish my work before fun with my friends. 

Aunt Doris was my first boss, mentor, and teacher. She was small, but very mighty. One time she had an argument with my mom, Eleanor, and Aunt Doris got in the car and left the house. I was frantic and didn’t think she was ever coming back. She finally did and I was so thankful that she returned unharmed. 

My aunt taught me about hard work, reaching out to folks less fortunate than ourselves, and being honest with everyone. She strongly disliked folks who stole anything. She would never ask me to steal anything in life. Aunt Doris was blunt with her feelings and wanted to know the truth about her health, in front of me. It wasn’t good news. Our family doctor said she had 3 months to live, in front of me. I was an 11 year old, in shock! I loved my aunt and didn’t believe the doctor. But almost 3 months later, she died of heart failure. 

Her death was one of many shocks in my life. I really miss her attitude that I could do anything in life. She was a tough cookie, and she always encouraged me to finish what I started and not too hate. Unfortunately, I’ve still needed her wisdom sometimes and find myself feeling down and depressed about my life. 

I have said that I have hated some folks, because of badly hurt feelings. I need someone like her in my life, because I’ve lost the folks who’ve encouraged me the most. I lost her through death at such a critical time in my young life. I’m not sure why folks like  my Aunt Doris, are taken from us when we need them the most? 

I don’t know the answer to these life questions, but I have looked for others to provide me with a mentoring relationship. I found a fantastic nurse to do that once. In AmeriCorps, I found my supervisor  to take on that role for me. I really needed her support and faith in myself, to complete jobs she gave me, to do. We had a very interesting relationship with myself approaching her with work ideas and she said, get it done. I know she didn’t know my Aunt Doris, but it was almost like she was channeling her? 

The fact is, I’m not ashamed to say I needed my supervisor in my life as a BFF and mentor. I learned to love her and wanted her as a business partner. Our relationship may have been too much for office politics and I payed the price for this. But, I did know that she was someone very special in my life! It was maybe complicated, but I was very happy when I saw her and worked with her. It complicated things, because she very pretty, but I really learned I could step out into another career and produce great work! Everyone needs a mentor and BFF! They can really benefit the business world. I had been through a Divorce and didn’t realize who I needed in my life, until I met her. 

So I remember two very important persons in my life, that were both mentors of mine. I would love to do business with my AmeriCorps  supervisor again. We had great ideas and we got our work done quickly. We were a great team and I really miss not working with her again, in some capacity. 

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Posted by on March 11, 2017 in Uncategorized


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