I was just reading my practical technical conversational writing style and the writing of Dr. Elton Trueblood from his book, ” The Common Ventures of Life.” Dr. Trueblood, was a professor of Philosophy, at Earham College in Indiana, probably during the 1940’s. He spoke and wrote about, marriage, work, birth, and death. I found his writing about death to trigger a near death experience I had in 2014, in Maine, during AmeriCorps.
Death is a great loss to everyone who has ever loved me or any other human or animal. A loss of a job or career can result in someone’s demise or at their own hand. What about a long term illness or chronic illness of intractible pain? That could result in pain also and someone’s loss of life.
I have been involved in a near tragic major loss of life accident in Maine, when I was in AmeriCorps. I was the person who was designated to die, but other victims were supposed to die also. Someone knows why this occured, don’t they have a guilty conscience? Maybe they do not? I couldn’t ever plan someone’s death in a zillion years.
This near death experience has left me with incredibly bad PTSD, with my love interest not being with me, resulted in my being fired from my AmeriCorps job, and left me wondering, why me and other innocent persons were scheduled to die needlessly?
I know it had to do with my loved one and supervisor, at the time. Maybe it also had to do with the refugee populations I was working with at the time, my number was just up, or someone wanted to just scare me, but it was a near tragedy.
This near death experience has resulted in our major loss of sleep, need for extra sleeping medication, worsening of my Multiple Sclerosis symptoms, and major problems for my lover, BFF, and fellow co-worker my AmeriCorps supervisor!
Of the most affected of this near death experience is myself and my AmeriCorps supervisor from 2013-2014. I e-mailed her about this near accident, because I wanted her to know about what happened to me. I truly hope nothing was scheduled for her also. Because, so many folks we worked with and loved, such as relatives, knew we were in love with eachother.
I actually didn’t know I was in love with her, until this tragic event, but I sure knew when it was happening. I had a classic near death event when I visualized the images of those family members I loved and realized they loved me too.
This episodic tragedy was planned and scheduled by someone who knew both of our where abouts. They knew I would be driving my car to my school volunteer event. Someone knew the route I always took. This is someone who likes schedules and plans group gatherings. This was an event of malice, with pre-thought, and someone who didn’t care about my life or my lovers life. She has suffered greatly, because of this!
No one had to suffer that day in 2014, but someone wanted myself, my AmeriCorps supervisor, and many innocent folks to suffer needlessly. This person is an incredibly jealous and selfish person. Again, when will innocent lives stop being a major tragedy?